Shop Talk.

My grandfather (Dionisio Sr.) is a barber, and has been doing his thing for years: cutting my hair since I was able to get my first haircut. For as long as I can remember, when it was time for a haircut, my dad (Dionisio Jr.) and I woke up really early on Saturday mornings and were out the door by 5:15am to get to my pop pop's shop before he officially opened and the crowd arrived. The more I think about it, I don't necessarily think this was a weird Puerto Rican cultural thing, it was just a father and son heading to south Jersey to get a free haircut and exchange shop talk with the old men at the barber shop. Although we always left super early to get there before the crowd arrived, no matter the time of year, there were men waiting. We could get there an hour and 15 minutes before official opening time in 30 degree weather, and there would still be men waiting outside for my pop pop to unlock the door. What can I say, the Roman men always draw a crowd.

The crazy thing is, when you sit down and listen to these guys you find out they have been getting their haircut by my pop pop for 5, 10, 15 years, following him from shop to shop throughout his career. So, I am pretty particular about my hair (don’t fault me, it’s in my genes), and there is a reason why I wake up at 5am every 4th Saturday to take an hour drive to see my pop pop: there’s no one better than him with those clippers (or scissors).

My grandfather is 79 years old, his birthday is the day before mine, and no matter what picture I show him of what I want my next cut to look like (trendy as can be), he makes it happen. It‘s not like he’s out in the streets or on social media seeing the latest hairstyle trends of 2021, he just understands the art to its core. I have even brought friends to get haircuts from him over the years (and yes, they got up early with me). Of course we also make the trip to spend some time with my grandparents; we always stop by the house after the barber shop to see my nana - she always has coffee for us. But the reason I bring all of this up (although I know it is unique) is because of what my grandfather said to me the last time we were there…

My grandparents are from PR. They’ve been back and forth from the mainland US over the years, having some of their children in the US and others on the island (6 in total!), but they generally have family all over. Although not always perfect, these two individuals are some of the hardest working and most sacrificial people I have ever encountered. Culturally stone cold Puerto Rican, telling you exactly how it is when you need to be told, but also incredibly loving with the warmest of hearts. With all of that, I always knew my grandfather was a hard worker, as was my grandmother, doing all that they could to provide for their family, making the absolute most they could for them. But what struck me the last time we were at the barber shop was my grandfather telling us how back when he was younger he used to work harder than everyone around him. He said he used to stand out among all the workers, and even the boss could not compete, complaining of back pain the next day, while my grandfather was unphased and ready for more. I have never heard him talk like this before, but the parallels I can draw from this to my own father are unheard of. I am pretty certain my grandfather didn't talk much to his sons about his work history or what it means to be a hardworking man, but he must have shown it. Growing up my dad constantly instilled in me the value of hard work. His adult life was an insane grind that I am fortunate not to have to endure. He always said, “when I was in the hole digging, I made sure that everyone knew that no one worked harder than me, that I was the best at the task that I was given.” It was unbelievable to me that this was the exact same thing my grandfather recently told me, even though I know he and my dad never had that conversation.

So what, is it a Dionisio thing? Or is it men instilling in their offspring, whether spoken or unspoken, the value of serving one's family, and making a name for themselves no matter how big or small. Moral of the story is, actions appear to speak equally as loudly as words. Generationally we are soooo different, but our internal drives are the same. Let’s be the best at what we do, and make our mark doing it.

Hope you enjoyed the week end read,

Dionisio III